you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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