Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
