just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Randomize
