I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize