Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Everything about him screamed your future.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Randomize
