I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
