a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Randomize
