Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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