I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
