You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
Randomize
