Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
