We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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