Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize
