Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
