That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
