I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Church boner. Awkwardddd
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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