In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
