Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
time to smoke my breakfast
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Your cock deserves a montage
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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