yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
