why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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