Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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