So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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