I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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