Porn is love you can see.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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