Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Acid is not a monday night drug
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I have aggressive nipples.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
is it fun? or sober?
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
