Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
You made out with two different species that night
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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