I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
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