her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
They should really pass out barf bags in church
I just tried to put my feet in my slippers and found cans of beer in them. Christmas in fucking july.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
