i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
