We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Randomize