After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Randomize
