So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize