Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
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