OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
