a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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