I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
