Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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