Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
