Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
