why didn't you poke me back
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
