Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
