i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
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