i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Randomize
