he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
