the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
love makes seman taste better
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
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