I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
