I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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