Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
