Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
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