Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize
