There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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